Sunday, April 3, 2011

BBQ Field Trip #2: Luling City Market

Greetings fat kids! March was one hell of a month for me. Between Tahoe, SXSW, and my family coming into town in late March, I have probably taken a few years off of my life. But it was all worth it, despite some serious damage to my liver and fitness.

Last week my mom and brother were in town for the weekend. Luke was visiting college campuses trying to come to a final decision as to where he will be attending school next fall, and my Mom came with for the trip to Austin. Even though my family and I lived in Texas for 8 years, it was in Round Rock, and we didn't spend a lot of time exploring the gem that is Austin, TX. So every time they are in town, I love to act as an ambassador/tour guide - exploring the restaurants and sights we missed while living in the burbs. This definitely includes a BBQ road trip every time they are in town. Last time it was a trip to Coopers for my graduation dinner. This time it was City Market in Luling.

The trip began at my house at 11:30 on Saturday morning. As I have mentioned previously, the 11:30 departure was crucial as the BBQ bewitching hour happens somewhere between 11:30 and 1; and if I am going to make an hour (or longer) drive each direction for BBQ, it better be at it's best! As usual, there were a bunch of "tentatives" that had partied a little too hardy to make the pilgrimage on a Saturday morning, leaving us with a comfortable group of 6: Asa, Corey, Mom, Luke, Adam Salamon, and I. Asa and Corey drove down in Asa's car, and the rest of us piled up (very comfortably) in Adam's Murano, and shot down 183 to Luling.

The drive down 183 south to Luling could not be more different than the drive up 71 to Llano (and Coopers). Where the drive to Coopers is hilly, beautiful, and entertaining, the drive down 183 to Luling is flat, desolate, and depressing. I actually feel like any trip to Coopers has the added benefit of the scenic drive. In the late spring (coming up very soon actually) the hills will be covered with wildflowers of all colors, painting an absolutely dreamy landscape to your left and right during the 90 minute drive. I wish I could say something even remotely similar for the drive to Luling, but being frank, you drive in a straight line for 60 minutes surrounded by some of the ugliest terrain in Central Texas. It's brown, dusty, desolate. If you're looking for evidence that Texas isn't the most naturally beautiful place on the planet, you wouldn't need to look much further than that strip of land. Word to the wise: bring along a good conversationist or some good music. It's gonna be a long drive.

The drive down 183 takes you right through Lockhart. Every time I go to Luling, it takes an unbelievable amount of will not to stop at Kreuz or Smitty's...if only for a "snack". Asa and Corey were a bit ahead of us, and started to get worried that we stopped in Lockhart and forgot to tell them. It's only an additional 15 minutes to get to Luling, and arguably worth it every single time. Still, temptation is a bitch.





We arrived in Luling, and immediately hopped into line. The smell hits you in the face as you walk in the front door. Although the smoke room is in the back (where you actually purchase the meat), the smell permeates the entire restaurant with it's glorious delectable perfume. It's an excellent aperitif, building the hunger as you wait for what seems like an eternity. We arrived a few minutes after 12:30 and had a moderate line in front of us. Maybe a 10-15 minute wait after the hour drive is actually lucky. The line continued to grow as we waited, and by the time we had ordered our food, was snaking around the entire dining room, probably a 30-40 minute wait near the back.


The smoke room is isolated, and with good reason. The pits are hot, the smoke is heavy, and after a few minutes in there you start to wonder if you are slowly becoming BBQ yourself. It's a cash only establishment, so there is an ATM located right outside the smoke room, your last hurdle to overcome before enjoying BBQ perfection. Once inside the smoke room, you have 3 options: Sausage, Brisket, and Ribs. I have to applaud Luling's simplicity, especially when compared to the extravagance of Cooper's. It's never a question of what you want (you want it all), it's just a question of how much. The Fat Kid standard? 4 ribs per person, 1-2 links of sausage per person (2 at Luling), 1/2 lb of brisket per person (go light on brisket at City Market). We ended up spending about 5+ minutes in the smoke room, waiting on the two MASSIVE orders in front of us. One guy's bill ran over $200. The smoke was too intense, and my momma had to step out for a minute or two until we could actually order.

The pits in the smoke room. Epic.

After the crew got their orders we snagged a table in the back to dig in. Common with a lot of BBQ joints, you order meat in one place, and sides/drinks/etc in another. I personally believe this is because sides really deserve second class treatment. You don't need them. You probably shouldn't order them. Even drinks are usually superfluous. Hopefully this anecdote can illustrate my point: My mom picked up 4 beers (for 3 people) and we actually had to argue who was going to drink the last free beer, because no one really wanted it. I can't remember the last time I passed up a free Shiner. Ever. And sides just fill you up...so why bother?

Yeah

I could very comfortably claim City Market has the best ribs, the best sausage, and the best sauce on the planet. Any one of those 3 elements alone would be worth the drive. the ribs are barky. Every single one was perfectly barky. Every.single.one. How is that possible? Tender, but still retaining their texture, with the addictive bark on the top is just not possible on every rib. Yet they accomplished it. Mesmerizingly smokey, slightly salty (but not overly pronounced like many other places), just perfect.

The sausage is a revelation. The best BBQ sausage I've ever had. Better than the ribs, even. Literally exploding with grease, these sausages are in no way good for you. The texture is perfectly crumbly, the smoke flavor unparalleled, the fat permeating every piece of the sausage. I feel like I should be writing soliloquies about this sausage, singing every one of it's praises, pointing out ever intricacy of it's flavor. But I have neither the skill nor patience to do that, so I feel like you just need to trust me on this one: best.sausage.ever. 

Which leads us to the sauce. The sauce of the gods. It's mustard based. It's sweet. It's very tangy. It's got a bit of spice to it. You don't feel like you're drinking liquid fat like with the Salt Lick's sauce. If that's the easiest frame of reference for this review, then imagine the Salt Lick's sauce. Now amplify all of it's characteristics. It's bigger, it's bolder, it's got more zip, but still is far more balanced and light than the Salt Lick's sauce. It's a perfect compliment to City Market's heavy smokiness and absurd fattiness. It cuts through the heaviness and adds it's own twangy goodness without overpowering. It could easily steal the show (and frankly does, in a lot of ways), but is only a part of the equation making up the perfect rib or the perfect sausage. It's the stuff that dreams are made of. Oh, and you can buy a quart of the sauce at the front for $3.50. Worth it, every time.

Lastly - the brisket. Now don't get me wrong. Their brisket is in no way bad. It's actually quite good. But it's just not elite. Not anything like the ribs. Not anything like the sausage. Not anything like the sauce. The sauce can actually make it taste quite amazing, but it needs the sauce. Which is a critical shortcoming for BBQ. The brisket is a bit tougher than you'd like from a place like City Market. It's also a bit leaner than you'd expect. Think of something more resembling a slice from one of the larger, more commercial places. The smoke flavor is nice (but not as heavy as the other meats at City Market), but still not over the top quite like that of Cooper's, Snow's, or Kreuz. I wouldn't say that you need to avoid the brisket, but given the option of only 2 of the 3, I'd never even consider getting the brisket. My general rule of thumb with 1/2 lb of brisket per person doubles when you go to Cooper's (because it's just.that.damn.good), and gets cut in half at Luling, because you are better off getting double or triple the sausage you thought you wanted.

We drove home, sluggishly, meat coma in full effect. The crew was absolutely floored by the meal, just as I was, and ready to nap away the afternoon. And so we did.

The more I write this review, the more I am convinced that Luling City Market is the perfect counterpoint to Cooper's. Cooper's has the greatest brisket known to man, and some of the worst BBQ sausage I've ever had. It's foil, City Market, has the greatest sausage, and shockingly mediocre brisket. Cooper's is still my favorite, still the champ, but the change of pace at Luling City Market is a beautiful thing. As a last note, I will eventually revisit Lockhart. But for the time being - if you're making the drive to Lockhart, you might as well just continue on another 15 minutes. It's worth it.

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