More BBQ Ramblings

Seeing as this was the first Fat Kid Field Trip to get BBQ went to Cooper's, there will certainly be others in the future. Stay posted and check my facebook for last minute notices of future field trips. Why not work our way down the list of top 5 BBQ restaurants in Texas?

1. Cooper's BBQ - Llano, TX
1. Most diverse menu in the state and everything except the sausage could be the best you will ever have. Well worth the 1.5 hour drive from Austin. Don't forget a stop by DQ on the way out. :)
   
2. Snow's BBQ - Lexington, TX
1. The pitmaster is a woman named Tootsie who is pushing 80. They are open ONLY on Saturday mornings, from 8am until they run out of BBQ, around 11am. Texas Monthly voted this best in Texas a few years back, and while I can't argue, Cooper's just can't be topped in my book. Possibly the best sausage in Texas, and solidly tied for best Brisket with Cooper's and Best Sauce with Luling City Market.
3. Luling City Market - Luling, TX
1. Best ribs in Texas. 2nd Best Sausage in the state behind Snow's, and tied for Best Sauce, also with Snow's. The brisket routinely leaves a bit to be desired, but I personally feel it's worth the extra 10-15 minute drive through Lockhart if you aren't hankering for brisket.
4. Smitty's Market - Lockhart, TX
1. 45 minute drive from Austin yielding world class ribs and sausage. The brisket can be variable at times. Very minor differences between this and rival Kreuz Market, just down the street put it over the top. Typically, you go to Smitty's for the ribs, Kruez for the brisket.
5. Kruez Market - Lockhart, TX
1. My first love. The famous sign outside once read "No Barbecue Sauce / No Forks / No Salads / No Credit / No Kidding". They now offer forks and take credit cards. My love has since moved on to a few other places, but the Shoulder Clot and Brisket at Kruez are always hard to top.

A few other miscellaneous BBQ related thoughts and snobbery.

Overrated 'Cue -

Franklin Barbecue in Austin, Louie Mueller's in Taylor, and The Salt Lick are the 3 most overrated BBQ restaurants in Texas. Do they put out quality product? Sure, they put out admirable stuff when compared to your Pok-e-Jo's, Chisolm Trail's, and Bill Miller's. Do they deserve to be mentioned in the same breath as the 5 BBQ havens listed above? Never.

I've had each of these places at least 4-5 times (more for Salt Lick), and while they have their redeeming qualities, some even bordering on excellent, I can't see how anyone would gush over any of them. The meat is so "moist" at Franklin it's like eating meat pudding (no texture), but their pulled pork is pretty mean and they make some interesting sauces. Salt Lick's 'cue can be tough, lacking smoke flavor, or just generally uninspiring, but I'll be damned if their sauce doesn't take great on anything. Louie Mueller has just never been great any time I've been there - from tough 'cue to undersalted 'cue, but they did pull together a decent sausage once.

Sauce -

I love a good sauce. Commercial places usually do it exceptionally well....because they have to. I may love some of the top Sauces on my list simply because they go so well with the already perfect BBQ, and have never had it with anything else. The Rudy's and Salt Lick of the world I've had on everything from breakfast tacos to pizza and loved it. With that, here goes my list of favorite Sauces:

1) Snow's BBQ - You can pick up a bottle from the restaurant, or order online. Perfectly balanced between vinegar, pepper, tomato, and sweetness...it's just perfect. Everything about it is perfect. Plus I love how they serve it in empty water bottles at the restaurant.

2) Luling City Market - You can buy it from their store...and I think that's about it. DO NOT BE FOOLED BY THE IMPOSTER IN THE HOUSTON GALLERIA. It's tangy goodness is hard to beat.

3) The Salt Lick - Spicy or Original, it doesn't matter which as they are both just pure fat and sugar. Pure Fat and Sugar...how can you beat it? If you look at the nutritional label I think the sauce is like 34% fat or something ridiculous like that. Tangy, sweet, fatty, mustardy goodness. Very different than your traditional tomato based BBQ sauces, the best part is that you can buy this sauce at your local HEB (and maybe even wider distribution outside of Texas).

4) Rudy's - My first sauce love, and still one of my favorites. Spicy, peppery tomato goodness

5) Smoky Mo's - Very similar to Rudy's, but a bit spicier. I also find this sauce a bit better with beef. Overall about a 8/10.

Cooking BBQ -

I could buy a smoker. I could spend the rest of my life trying to get anywhere near the awesomeness that Cooper's exhibits on a daily basis. But I would fail miserably. And frankly, so will you. BBQ restaurants do everything wrong as a restaurant. You order at a counter. You sit at a table with a bunch of random strangers, who are usually making a huge mess. They serve you with plastic utensils. They give you wax paper instead of a plate. They make you clean up your mess after yourself.  At their best, you will stink of smoke from standing near a bit for 5 minutes, and it lasts with you until you go home, wash your clothes, and take a shower.

But they do one thing right: make a nearly inedible cut of meat the greatest fucking thing you've ever tasted. And it takes YEARS of practice, with pits that have been around for longer than most of us have been alive, and a practice of getting up at 4am to serve people hot delicious food.

So I decide to leave it to the professionals. I'll do my best to try and out cook and outclass any restaurant in Austin. I'm still not sold any restaurant in town cooks better Italian than I do, or at the very least I couldn't replicate what I just ate on their menu with a try or two. With 'Cue I could spend years perfecting something I will never get any good at. The best home barbecue I've ever had is still a massive disappointment in comparison to the 5 shrines listed above.

If it's your hobby, God bless your pursuit of perfection, however misguided it may be. You have much more patience than I do.